tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-86111500835410681022024-02-19T16:04:55.027+00:00ArtbroadsiderKikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.comBlogger28125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-19263906750132900282011-05-04T17:12:00.009+01:002011-05-15T09:30:21.296+01:00Re-Thinking<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZ_p1feXH_dz8e3OPHN3cA4BU76RGgfhG_jHUDMer_9pqNZcFftinWNZwpeL-mVwBPJoaDXvkNprv1mtE8eamqexjdbROXqYBMtK0WmvtnUJ2L3JWwSHfmM1qMOxaJxLBXQ3YbAElv1sE/s1600/IMG_1616.JPG"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 150px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZ_p1feXH_dz8e3OPHN3cA4BU76RGgfhG_jHUDMer_9pqNZcFftinWNZwpeL-mVwBPJoaDXvkNprv1mtE8eamqexjdbROXqYBMtK0WmvtnUJ2L3JWwSHfmM1qMOxaJxLBXQ3YbAElv1sE/s200/IMG_1616.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5606856184293582018" /></a><br /><br />Hi There,<br /><br />Looks like my body really does not like chemotherapy. Even if Gemzar and Cisplatin work in vitro, as the Nagourney assay showed, that combination does not work for me. <br /><br />My PET scan sucked big time, lots of progression. While numbers and digital pictures help us gauge what is happening with our bodies in this crazy mixed up world, I refuse to let that get me down. I am taking several supplements to help halt the progression of the cancer, NAC and Quercitin, suggested by <a href="http://www.drbazzan.com/db/pages/aboutus/drbazzan.html">Dr. Anthony Bazzan</a>. I need time detox from all the chemo, (which made me so sick I had to have a blood transfusion with platelets thrown in for good measure) and rethink what the hell I am going to do. I do know I am going to juice fast, then perhaps water fast while I decide what to do next. Fasting is a very powerful way to get the body to heal. <br /><br />Heal!<br /><br /><br />KikiKikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-27381497540884442582011-04-27T11:54:00.005+01:002011-05-15T09:39:25.826+01:00Waiting<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5uKnKrmaI1Ma9TC9RC7rO7OmIRoNgB9ZLWsctQk4mjX6saB8MuDDESZt38cFRj3HcH2QSkvfmGh-zxFR9UvBGMLI0Vy-abkNyiTVo44RPKXJq0zum2BhMsbMJhjmjjuQOoR2pSMhpTVk/s1600/IMG_1765.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 150px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5uKnKrmaI1Ma9TC9RC7rO7OmIRoNgB9ZLWsctQk4mjX6saB8MuDDESZt38cFRj3HcH2QSkvfmGh-zxFR9UvBGMLI0Vy-abkNyiTVo44RPKXJq0zum2BhMsbMJhjmjjuQOoR2pSMhpTVk/s200/IMG_1765.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5606858562147264242" /></a><br />Waiting for PET scan results. Have been at <a href="http://www.anoasisofhealing.com/">An Oasis of Healing</a> clinic for almost a month. One of the best clinics I know to help guide cancer travelers to a more healthy lifestyle and healing. The staff there are phenomenal. I feel great! Still a PET scan can make one feel crazy.Kikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-66180976591586176842011-01-28T16:32:00.006+00:002011-01-28T16:54:52.851+00:00A letter to my liver and painting trees<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjwr3x38YpEjZcWxl4HTJecSqBRL5UoQRh7X4pW66CF2nbWlmwINOSsclN2CQdk4PDr2kj4nUGmV0d-HUnNAfdAZFHVVVs-_soq085nvPBUpoySvDR-4ySb0CZuElWL_Oej6pTcIjXiXSs/s1600/headmaster%2527s-garden-winter.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 134px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjwr3x38YpEjZcWxl4HTJecSqBRL5UoQRh7X4pW66CF2nbWlmwINOSsclN2CQdk4PDr2kj4nUGmV0d-HUnNAfdAZFHVVVs-_soq085nvPBUpoySvDR-4ySb0CZuElWL_Oej6pTcIjXiXSs/s200/headmaster%2527s-garden-winter.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5567279038801035474" /></a><br /><br /><br />Hi Friends,<br /><br />Goodness, what a month already. Remember I was sick of being sick, well I actually ended up in the hospital. Wow! The Xeloda is giving me trouble with breathing, my heart, and more (like they say in ads). Still my doctors want me to stay on it until they can work out what I can do to stave off those little bastards that are still in my liver.<br /><br />Open letter to my liver. <br /><br />Dear Liver, <br /><br />Please, please be healthy, and mark those maverick cells to self destruct. I don't want to be unkind, but I need you to work harder at expelling them, and creating much more flexible and generous cells, ones who have a better work ethic. I don't mind the idea of going rogue, but not right now. We all need to work as a team-you know "all for one and all that". <br /><br />I will give you more green juice and you can do your Japanese warrior thing okay. <br /><br />With love<br /><br />Kiki<br /><br />That is it really. I want to get on with my art. I am painting these watercolors at present, I like them and think they have a potential for something in the future. Back in the tree business. How wonderful and amazing they are. Most are sleeping, at rest, and shut down like giant bears dotted all over. Buds closed tight, until spring when out will come their flower and berry secrets. Joy, just can't wait. It will help me identify them too.<br /><br />What am I talking about you may wonder. Around where I live, is a literal cornucopia of timber. Amazing trees, some indigenous to pennsylvania others, brought in and exotic. Right on my doorstep are these giant plants. I have already started to research and document them. I look forward to painting them.<br /><br />So, yes enough sickness. Bring on the paintbrushes for goodness sake. I need an art infusion now!<br /><br />KikiKikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-82778617747845333712011-01-02T12:00:00.005+00:002011-01-02T19:55:50.724+00:00New Year<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjY_NkKgOPIWCwtU9dGrP2OM3eIdHxIK_9j4VCYQB4L6v_HNAqGbkuhsp-7r-351f4reqXHQIwGZ3wiWHArrz4uGjiwRWD6bTcSyOioFJQ9oS7-vF0xL6UxGVcoTGzk7dmvTyI_iCm31mI/s1600/larry-liver.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 212px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjY_NkKgOPIWCwtU9dGrP2OM3eIdHxIK_9j4VCYQB4L6v_HNAqGbkuhsp-7r-351f4reqXHQIwGZ3wiWHArrz4uGjiwRWD6bTcSyOioFJQ9oS7-vF0xL6UxGVcoTGzk7dmvTyI_iCm31mI/s320/larry-liver.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5557560867234307202" /></a><br /><br />Gosh, Happy New Year Everyone,<br /><br />What a year! Do you know I am so sick of having cancer. I am so over having this disease. I have researched so much about it, ate the right food, done the diet, changed my thinking, life and so on. Still my "terrain" my personal environment is playing host.<br /><br />I have been thinking about the hostess me. What I am giving this cancer to keep it at my party? The wine, the chocolate? I know I need to take this body out and get more exercise- this is on my list of new years intentions. To get myself out there. <br /><br />It is sometimes so hard to "get out there", especially as I decided to take the chemotherapy drug, Xeloda. It makes one tired, gives me the most outrageous hot flashes. One minute of nausea and intense sadness, and two minutes of heat which as all you hot flashers out there know feels like an eternity.<br /><br />Do I still have the stamina to keep moving forward in this crazy god given life I have- you becha! I have found another doctor (I know one more) who has a practice associated with the <a href="http://www.jeffersonhospital.org/Home/departments-and-services/integrative-cancer-program.aspx">Jefferson Hospital in Philadelphia.</a> I think he some ideas and treatments which will help my liver. High dose vitamin C, and Milk thistle infusions. Thank goodness there are still some options.Kikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-32979965456390210312010-09-06T17:56:00.009+01:002011-01-02T12:00:05.283+00:00Today<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1M39OA02Thx6sDqOKY4HvgMWsRvel1dyICNlTJpGSfcnYogi2xPtRbPtsCxndoVaC0CYBW98xRwbPDFaJWXr-B06mnCZrbBIWXLT2f03ES6uZ61OZ2vmswfnxS47mpbnHwz6N9LsZyUQ/s1600/bailey+and+me.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 319px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1M39OA02Thx6sDqOKY4HvgMWsRvel1dyICNlTJpGSfcnYogi2xPtRbPtsCxndoVaC0CYBW98xRwbPDFaJWXr-B06mnCZrbBIWXLT2f03ES6uZ61OZ2vmswfnxS47mpbnHwz6N9LsZyUQ/s320/bailey+and+me.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5513845691098425858" /></a><br /><br /><br />Today I was updating my "Crazy Sexy Cancer" profile page I thought I would share it with you all.<br /><br /><br />About Me:<br />I am an artist, and was a college professor. I believe in love, living passionately and looking at life as one big adventurous opportunity. I have walked the road less travelled by, and while It has been hard life is a treasure. Still walking after 12 years of C.<br /><br />I have metastasized breast cancer in my lungs, (BC since 1998 ER and PR positive) my pelvis, L2 and now have some little suckers in my liver. I believe in loving and not being at war with myself is the answer, as I cannot hate my cancer, it is not the devil to be exorcised. My cancer is a result of something I am not looking at, something physical, emotional, environmental. I am not going to give up digging, delving, and researching. Cancer is the "call" the call to listen, to change, to make an action. Today I was thinking of the word "defiant". Defiant at what has been presented to me on my CT scan, defiant that my number is up, defiant that I will be pushing up daisies by next year! That is it right now anyway. Nope not gonna accept the pink slip.<br /><br />At present, I am studying the history of the liver, and why I am so drawn to the color red. When I was diagnosed with mets in my lungs it was yellow, bones orange-am I working my way down the color chakras, isn't it supposed to be the other way around. Perhaps I can find my own Da Vinci Code!<br /><br />There you have it today.<br /><br />P.S. Has anyone see the Showtime series <a href="http://www.sho.com/site/thebigc/home.do">"The Big C</a>" unless she has some cathartic turn-around, that show is a piece of giant poo! I don't know one person with cancer who acts that way. Who can be so glib when your life is on the line, maybe at first, but honestly. I think "The Big C" is a Hollywood "idea" of what one would do, and the general unknowing public (Sorry general unknowing public), a game one plays at a party "So what would you do if you had only a year to live?" I especially don't like the way they have written the support group people. Those people can sometimes be our only lifeline! Boo to Laura Linney who produces it. I hope you turn your character around!Kikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-52096170988488521482010-08-12T18:22:00.021+01:002010-08-24T19:44:41.877+01:00Cheese and Wine, so Hard to Resist<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5pSbYN8eioH_F6QYQzV4pI2ISB-ZWKWI_zL_4lwFTPphnagubevp4vJPYxr-I7yhab5CPCnchYEPVn_I6dcTCjz9z6BorUzVYrOvma6YMSTmG37R3uOS_bo91oUlRvLqB8YirOy2PouE/s1600/10-08-wine-glass-with-choc-and-cheese.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 300px; height: 254px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5pSbYN8eioH_F6QYQzV4pI2ISB-ZWKWI_zL_4lwFTPphnagubevp4vJPYxr-I7yhab5CPCnchYEPVn_I6dcTCjz9z6BorUzVYrOvma6YMSTmG37R3uOS_bo91oUlRvLqB8YirOy2PouE/s320/10-08-wine-glass-with-choc-and-cheese.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5504659870042064690" /></a><br />Rhythms, rituals, and routines is the hallmark of my life it seems. I am sure we all share those to some degree. This past summer, which is nearly over, just lacked all of that. I just couldn't get a grip on it, and as a result felt just rudderless.<br /><br />I have a wonderfully organized garden which has some great vegetables growing like mad in several patches and also I have a studio in an adjacent apartment to ours to work in. However getting out there, getting up there, was/is like pulling teeth. Of course it was so hot so soon this summer, as most would agree, who could do much but complain, wait and argue, (I felt bloated, fat, and tired most of the time) and mostly because I found myself eating the wrong food. Not wrong, but not "appropriate to my health issues".<br /><br />I do have to pat myself on the back because even though it appeared and was sort of true I wasn't eating very well, I actually was getting in two raw salads a day, and several green smoothies. The problem was I was adding in several glasses of red wine, chocolate and cheese! <br /><br />Gosh Cheese! Who can not live without wine and cheese, and moreover, who can not love wine and cheese? (except a lactose intolerant person or those few aliens from another planet who wince at the sight or smell of it) Further when you eat cheese you have to have a rich red multi-layered, berry-laced, slightly earthy cabernet or a fresh slightly grapefruit-y, tangy, gooseberry white. Certainly if one has the wine first, the cheese inevitably comes next as one is too happy to care. Life becomes a dream of tastes and delight, one feels a post orgasmic bliss of the soul, the vapors even. <br /><br />What I love to do is have a mouthful of a nice full bodied red wine, swallow, pause for a minute to get fullness of the taste, then eat a cherry, enjoy that, then take another sip of the wine, and wow! The fruits in the wine go wild. Now to "up the ante" have a piece of a strong blue cheese and then buckle up your seatbelt because that will send you to the moon, and while you are flying you can hear the "hallelujah" chorus in your head. Another fun thing is to have some white wine, get a chunk of Jarlsberg, and do the same, ships ahoy! Seriously cheese makes the wine creamer, the wine makes the cheese nuttier. So wonderful. The more healthy way to do this is to get an organic wine, or better still Whole Foods sells a "no sulfates added" organic wine, and raw goats cheese. These are less acidic for your body which is more healthy. I mention that because if you do fall off the wagon, at the very least you can be somewhat careful.<br /><br />Chocolate is another one of my pleasures; the reward giving, sinfully delicious, theobromine mind soother! which I have gobbled up like a naughty child hoping not to get caught. What is it about chocolate? It does have some amazing properties, but sadly not the kind we crave. The chocolate we love is heated, processed, has tons of sugar in it, and probably something the FDA and the AMA have also added to keep us addicted, so we don't ever uncover the truth, but that is another essay. <a href="http://www.navitasnaturals.com/products/cacao.html">Raw cocoa</a> though, is very very good for us in moderation (is that ever possible with this exotic pod). Raw cocoa has many properties that have been enjoyed for hundreds of years- one can experience an almost fruity taste when eaten in its raw state. Please try it with some Lucuma (a low calorie sweetener) or tiny spoonful of honey. Stevia forget it. I have tried so many kinds, it either tastes bitter, or the leaf kind literally smells like poo. No thank you! I'll take a few grams of natural sugar.<br /><br />Of course all of this is not allowed on the vegan diet, it is so sad. This summer I hope I got away with it, because as soon as my husband goes back to work to teach, it will be time to pull myself up by my boot straps and knock it off! Cancer just loves it when I get all gooey and cheesy, non selective and choosy. So once in Maine, for the last leg of this summer, it is back to the boot camp with occasional cheating (like on our wedding anniversary August 25th). I hope I can keep to it, as my life depends on it. It is so easy to fall of the wagon and stay off. Alas. Still I have my memories...Kikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-1172423925904843812010-05-20T17:33:00.006+01:002010-05-20T19:50:48.831+01:00What's Next?<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkbjZV9nudG7AC1KEQlXqkvOp6zQFCIMa8zmOcwVKMu6L-RpLKrYNKKuVn5RQ8t2uJGy44QR8bTlV8PPV5o3nQ3P5srhSFOTNKeRmrBfGUtFckdCug9Wqi8DPXbk3Dmd4oXyIO8k8rgCI/s1600/DSCN7792.JPG"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 150px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkbjZV9nudG7AC1KEQlXqkvOp6zQFCIMa8zmOcwVKMu6L-RpLKrYNKKuVn5RQ8t2uJGy44QR8bTlV8PPV5o3nQ3P5srhSFOTNKeRmrBfGUtFckdCug9Wqi8DPXbk3Dmd4oXyIO8k8rgCI/s200/DSCN7792.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5473426585224505266" /></a><br /><br /><br />Hi Dear Friends,<br /><br />What's next is the question I have been asking myself since I returned from the the wonderful "Oasis". I have taken a break for a while from tests, doctor visits and so on and just focused on walking the talk. It can be tough. <br /><br />I finally, after some pelvic pain and some depression rearing it's naughty head, realized it was time again to up the ante and get pro-active again. "Will this ever end?" you and I ask, my reply "No, it is for life, to get more life really." So here I go again.<br /><br />Last week I met with a new doctor whose name I won't mention but is was a disaster, such a shame as I had high hopes. I wrestled whether I should go back as they offered hi dose vitamin c, which I greatly need at present. After chatting with some other professionals I found out this is part the process too (and dropping 500 bucks! Whoa!) Finding people, surrounding oneself with healers, visionaries, and smart doctors is the way to get closer to healing. I noticed a pattern with the doctors I liked and ones that I did not; great visionary and learned doctors have a staff who are cut from the same cloth. All are positive with patients, are interesting to talk to, and have a holistic connection with the "process" of healing. Why would I want anything less than that. That said I talked with a second clinic and "voila" what a difference. The doctor called me back the same day, and was interested! How cool is that! I came off the phone knowing something new to do and an appointment. Pattern number 2: Cool doctors always can tell you something you didn't know. Pattern number 3: They also give you hope, and that is the best thing any doctor or person can do!Kikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-62342363766758133182010-04-01T21:39:00.006+01:002010-04-02T07:48:37.126+01:00Another Hard but Wonderful Slog<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBv6fyKFLFnsOzLh5LjfFtrFAF9yeekvmZeL4JJ9zBYf_H6IxMY2L9kLZ2TkPUppvHJzJ8xJvfywMYtRGe-pcTj0z_1X6i2GRoc8-SUPa6LVpk7OvCct0dW0F3jwugQ1M8qkIMBTyBuU0/s1600/10-3-trolly.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 80px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBv6fyKFLFnsOzLh5LjfFtrFAF9yeekvmZeL4JJ9zBYf_H6IxMY2L9kLZ2TkPUppvHJzJ8xJvfywMYtRGe-pcTj0z_1X6i2GRoc8-SUPa6LVpk7OvCct0dW0F3jwugQ1M8qkIMBTyBuU0/s320/10-3-trolly.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5455297777644986834" /></a><br />Hi Everyone,<br /><br />For the past few weeks, as you all know I have been going to a clinic in Arizona, "An Oasis of Healing" Cancer Clinic. Every day I was hooked up to an IV of some sort. Had a full body cleansing inside and out, and learnt more how to prepare raw vegan foods. It was really hard, but I am so glad I did it.<br /><br />One of the treatments I had was IPT (insulin potentiation therapy) a targeted and sneaky way to get chemotherapy into cancer cells. One day I had two chemos, another three other types. The whole process gets one really high, so the nurse, myself and the other IPT patients (who were so great) had a rock'n roll party as when you come down, you are must eat tons of natural sugar to get your blood sugar to normal. IPT does have cumulative side effects loss of appetite (except for sugar!) constipation, and some nausea, but can really help people. There was a patient there who just had his PET scan back with no new mets, and some now gone after 8 weeks. I hope it has helped me too. I will get a PET scan when I get back home (I am in California with my parents- so nice- for a week) Note though, when I mentioned I was looking into IPT my oncologist in PA went bonkers, and became all angry. So beware that.. it is considered not a real therapy. When I was getting my port put in at the local hospital in Mesa, AZ the surgeon there said he had seen some amazing things happen at the Oasis clinic. That gave me much confidence.<br /><br />In addition to IPT, I also had a treatment where blood was ozonated that was wild I must say, and in addition I had hi dose vitamin C infusions which is another cancer chaser... really gets in those cells and evicts them.<br /><br />After two weeks, I felt really tired and ready to stop as it was tough going, but I know what I learned there I can use now, and I can move forward in my healing. I am going to keep the treatments up by traveling up to Long Island once a month, and locally keeping up the less invasive treatments. <br /><br />This was one of the most bizarre and wonderful experiences, which I highly recommend.Kikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-10231204100925925872010-03-06T14:49:00.009+00:002010-03-08T17:59:06.874+00:00An Oasis of "Hope"<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhK4u9ijDpegYWBxV8whkswHcRz-gYDsxK_goZ5Smf6vmPanQi4lXWsXua4cFqz5MYhDNUVK0meZkj1ZkP7Ba7YC2AZ_TyIkN8rmd3xnEAHrQuMCPqQiGvWcJfM0aG5tlojszcXPe7RkKc/s1600-h/kiki-oasis.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 150px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhK4u9ijDpegYWBxV8whkswHcRz-gYDsxK_goZ5Smf6vmPanQi4lXWsXua4cFqz5MYhDNUVK0meZkj1ZkP7Ba7YC2AZ_TyIkN8rmd3xnEAHrQuMCPqQiGvWcJfM0aG5tlojszcXPe7RkKc/s200/kiki-oasis.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5445538388599761538" /></a><br /><br />Hello Dear Friends,<br /><br />I am on a wonderful healing adventure in Mesa, AZ. I am going to an incredible holistic clinic called <a href="http://www.anoasisofhealing.com">"An Oasis of Healing".</a><br /><br />With <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0h6OtIRePg8">Dr. Thomas Lodi</a> at the helm, he has created an "Oasis" A breathing space, a healing place. For me it is the lifestyle, foodstyle, spiritualstyle, medicalstyle, bootcamp I have always wanted! <br /><br />I decided to learn how to <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QKH_bCa_hok">"stop making cancer</a>" ( I have had 6 recurrences now) and enough is enough already. It is wonderful to see hope, happy faces, people getting better, doing well and to speak with a doctor who says "yes" instead on "no".<br /><br />Jack and I met with the doctor yesterday for an extended consultation. As we talked I could see how we could all just "up" the notch on what we were talking about. Finally, a doctor who is informed, knows so much more than I do, rather than the other way around. <br /><br />At the nutrition center we had lunch, a most delicious raw meal prepared by their chef, and also enjoyed being in the sun. Glorious! Hope is here!Kikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-539490643893960712010-02-12T16:47:00.005+00:002010-02-12T17:12:33.243+00:002 weeks and 2 days<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcT7Jac7R38Q0gaAzb0CKNKMq_k77j9C4Su6rOOhgt3K_2g2haDHlzGQ9Hi9MJD1_97lWSXGffFhvYnYNcnesnjNaIgJp2bDUfovd8A6w4jCAsuvW3-u894XSYKGe1SUwpjBV3Yl7k-3o/s1600-h/oxycontin1.gif"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 136px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcT7Jac7R38Q0gaAzb0CKNKMq_k77j9C4Su6rOOhgt3K_2g2haDHlzGQ9Hi9MJD1_97lWSXGffFhvYnYNcnesnjNaIgJp2bDUfovd8A6w4jCAsuvW3-u894XSYKGe1SUwpjBV3Yl7k-3o/s200/oxycontin1.gif" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5437399741351375218" /></a><br />Two weeks and two days. That's how long I have been off the Oxycontin. If you know anything about addiction to hard drugs, then this you might know is catagorized right up there with heroin. It's street name is called Hillbilly Heroin in fact. <br /><br />I was given it for pain, and it worked like nobody's business. However after two weeks the body starts to get used to the drug, and an addiction forms. No doctor actually warns you of this so beware. Only after I said I was tapering off did my oncologist say he could help me get off it. Even with help eventually one has to stop cold turkey. How bad can it be you may wonder?<br /><br />Ever had bugs crawling inside your skin, or want to literally cut your legs off because of the restless legs it gives you. Want to just have tantrum after tantrum. Scream at you loved ones for no good reason, then cry about it. All this and further there is diarrhea, stomach pain, nausea, and loss of interest in food. It now makes me crazy just writing about it.<br /><br />In Florida two weeks ago, I spent three nights up until 5am, exercising, listening to comedy tapes, knitting, praying, meditating to finally not have that last 5mg capsule. It was really hell I must say, but knowing in the morning I had made it through the night was reason to celebrate. I called my husband, danced around to Chakka Khan, and called my dear friend LaVonne. I had kicked it. <br /><br />I am still feeling the residual withdrawl, a tickle here and there, but it is really mild. I feel like I am back in the game- finally. Oxycontin and its sister Oxycodone are so addictive, I learned, they like to hang out in ones muscles, just stay there for a long time, and as a result, that makes one still crave the drug. And I do! Heroin does the same along with other narcotics. How fun! <br /><br />More to come but wanted to make this my first post of the new year. So think twice about getting that prescription refilled, it really is dancing with the devil. For now it is only Tylenol and Advil for me folks!Kikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-18330289330637395762009-11-09T14:34:00.008+00:002009-11-18T18:47:41.416+00:00So Over<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjClURrZxX2GZoJb6L30V76L_f8OqVlhd1bW3llpFy7n5jHm6TXF3JDkwgN9dLXnmD6ZrUAG-xCovzUPtO0G19jSWmKhS60x7K6CHe5fmE9cbtSxfxIL4se05F5_YHFAIb2KRpvC40aqv8/s1600-h/flowers+7+bw.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 182px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjClURrZxX2GZoJb6L30V76L_f8OqVlhd1bW3llpFy7n5jHm6TXF3JDkwgN9dLXnmD6ZrUAG-xCovzUPtO0G19jSWmKhS60x7K6CHe5fmE9cbtSxfxIL4se05F5_YHFAIb2KRpvC40aqv8/s200/flowers+7+bw.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5404011134776099634" /></a><br />My <a href="http://www.ehow.com/way_5246579_bone-cancer-radiation-treatment.html">radiation</a> is finally done, but leaving me feeling weak and frail. The cumilation of which last Tuesday evening had me in the ER then, in the hospital for three days. It seemed hi dose radiation did not sit well with my body, which went all out of whack. This is normal yet, I went over the top, and felt it more than most. I had terrible stomach pain, cramps, pelvic pain, vaginal bleeding, had become<a href="http://www.annieappleseedproject.org/canpatnutwas.html"> anorexic</a>, my body just shut down. It was shocking to me how quickly that can happen when you have stage IV. At one point I thought "will I get out of hospital?" and "why I am I here?, is is worse than I think it is?" Creepy.<br /><br /><br />I am out now, feel so much better, tons, just a bit washed out, and of course radiation tired. But now I am on several meds to calm my stomach down, stimulate my appetite. <br /><br />On the fabulous side, most of the bone pain is gone now which is fantastic (I still need to use my cane for balance and flare ups). Hopefully, in a couple of weeks I can return to my routine.<br /><br /><br />One thing that is funny, but actually sad is h<a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2009/jun/30/hospital-food-soil-association">ospital food.</a> How can I eat when all they serve is crap. I said to my mother, I feel like crap, so maybe eating the crap is good. I certainly loved the off the diet pancakes and maple syrup!Kikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-15888068033929273792009-10-24T05:49:00.003+01:002009-10-24T05:53:38.329+01:00Radiation Day 12<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisGZp2CNK1klCB8EwwfJCMUDQReMGbSfE4dZM_u0IINvV8kkSO4asmPahmum4WuJheK-E6pRRll1VBxCOt_6OLmThgAgHA6ev2mGluhn-COD1jV-Uj8dHwHP9XemMVhiBbLmUnTj52PR8/s1600-h/20070216-old+symbol.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 187px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisGZp2CNK1klCB8EwwfJCMUDQReMGbSfE4dZM_u0IINvV8kkSO4asmPahmum4WuJheK-E6pRRll1VBxCOt_6OLmThgAgHA6ev2mGluhn-COD1jV-Uj8dHwHP9XemMVhiBbLmUnTj52PR8/s200/20070216-old+symbol.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5396025148768242050" /></a><br /><br /><br />Feel sick, nauseous, almost done with only three treatments left. Pain is a little less which feels like a miracle. Mum is here, she is a gift. <br /><br />Need to rest.<br /><br />-again, more later :)Kikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-2361902009556607802009-10-07T13:22:00.003+01:002009-10-07T13:25:59.286+01:00Radiation Day<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXEjs8ydpMngEl2O3y1nN_1GUsBb-4LrMldllm2N_3VRYl7v31Gu-QfyuSSFKrQm7DzHvyrIcaIq6z6SWF7ixzVaAGWGL8aKeVqz7AEn0-lYe83-9Ilw35sIoT__u3daEoic4uIzRjP64/s1600-h/Vintage-Radiation-Meter-by-Shi-Yali-qpps_426531196440560.LG.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 116px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXEjs8ydpMngEl2O3y1nN_1GUsBb-4LrMldllm2N_3VRYl7v31Gu-QfyuSSFKrQm7DzHvyrIcaIq6z6SWF7ixzVaAGWGL8aKeVqz7AEn0-lYe83-9Ilw35sIoT__u3daEoic4uIzRjP64/s200/Vintage-Radiation-Meter-by-Shi-Yali-qpps_426531196440560.LG.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5389832703685229138" /></a><br /><br />More to come, but first I need to drink banana flavored barium tracer for CT scan afterwards. Yum!Kikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-88575988550578850942009-09-11T17:37:00.013+01:002009-10-08T14:33:20.388+01:00Mojo!<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwZy778r_nWluRAptTOGK026K1kTFj4JAo5c5xDw5T5W0HPg9T4DWKr7_Uw9L-KwXCh3BnuBCcxxSfqBBL8jqN7SzYowAX6U_mE2A-CmmcpVJYHxDs4bwtSZYeHPW6i94vgyK9eK_hF94/s1600-h/spiderman.jpeg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 160px; height: 120px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwZy778r_nWluRAptTOGK026K1kTFj4JAo5c5xDw5T5W0HPg9T4DWKr7_Uw9L-KwXCh3BnuBCcxxSfqBBL8jqN7SzYowAX6U_mE2A-CmmcpVJYHxDs4bwtSZYeHPW6i94vgyK9eK_hF94/s200/spiderman.jpeg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5380250032745381586" /></a><br />Brad a friend of mine just sent me this wonderful image of Spiderman to get some of Spiderman's mojo. I need it. Bring it on!<br /><br />Today I get my MRI and next week a bone scan and blood test ( I am already sick about that) Anyway one of my dear blogger friends talked about the waiting game. It is so true, I have been waiting for I don't know how long now to see exactly, absolutely what is wrong with these bones. To confirm or unconfirm, because the Johns Hopkins doctors after seeing the PET scan confirmed bone metastasis. So what is the problem with that you may ask. Well let me tell you...<br /><br />The reason for the unsure thing is that in Maine, (on holiday this summer I had increasing pain from a fall I had a two months earlier) the X-ray I had there was read to be possible bone metastasis, when we got back from our trip, I met with the the top J<a href="http://www.hopkinsortho.org/kristy_l_weber_md.html">ohns Hopkins Bone Dr. </a>she said no couldn't be, it's bursitis- have some physiotherapy. <a href="http://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/vascular/staff/physicians/georgiades.html">Johns Hopkins RFA guy</a> said doesn't look like cancer, 98 % not cancer. Then after reading the reports, Dr Bone said it is cancer always was, and RFA doc said 98 % is cancer. What? How can that be? You said before? Hey! I'm confused!<br /><br />Thankfully, my new husband called his doctors who rallied around and I now have a new oncologist and GP who want to know "what is in there?" Hence the MRI and bone scan. With all this waiting I haven't just sat around on my bottom the whole time, as you read I got married (to the most wonderful man in the whole world!) in addition I started my own physiotherapy (get that blood moving!) Just learned to do Reflexology on my own feet! Switched off some of the potent pain drugs and onto a natural one <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Salix_alba">White Willow Bark,</a> which is awesome! as the oxycodone was making me very stupid, and very much in my own world- so much that I fell and put myself in bed for a week (good going!)- What else, made myself buck up, and go back to a mostly raw diet, give up salt, do the coffee enemas, detox saunas, and practice the "8 pieces of Brocade" Tai Chi exercises in the morning. I am feeling so much more awake! Hallelujah<br /><br />In conclusion, friends, I need the warrior Spiderman mojo to help me through the next medical game show, and hopefully, they will agree to what is really wrong, at least 98% sure!<br /><br />Then there is the lump in my lymph node in my neck. All agree "yes it is" that's a bummer. More waiting " Jeezy Creezy" as Eddie Izzard says. Tell me how do I get off this thang? I have a headache!Kikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-37034245525010097632009-09-04T17:27:00.007+01:002009-09-20T23:21:44.507+01:00Life is Beautiful<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgsWC0N5AKA-WkQdXBD17-RFD70oU-X2QTraj5yItR-vWlnLZ2kYVHtPr3v6VA82w_XOjJgGF87Nh83deJev5XBi4I-ezMZ0IVxD4FlSF5dGKFHIqr8_EK8BRG1MHHwccEWtB6B5tzLl98/s1600-h/I+will+2+lr.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 150px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgsWC0N5AKA-WkQdXBD17-RFD70oU-X2QTraj5yItR-vWlnLZ2kYVHtPr3v6VA82w_XOjJgGF87Nh83deJev5XBi4I-ezMZ0IVxD4FlSF5dGKFHIqr8_EK8BRG1MHHwccEWtB6B5tzLl98/s200/I+will+2+lr.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5377653422396235650" /></a><br />Hello,<br /><br />Even though the dumpster truck has left steaming garbage on my lawn again- Jack and I just got married, and I couldn't be happier about that. The first time I was married I was so adamant about keeping my name. Now having new one is so refreshing, makes me so happy, perhaps it will give me some new mojo too. Legally I am still Felix, but once I attack all the paperwork I will be officially Mrs. Charles "Jack" Garrettson. So cool!<br /><br />We were married in Maine, just last week on a lobster boat in the middle of Penobscot Bay, near "Hell's Half Acre" isn't that fabulous. Had lunch, a long nap (well we are all getting older), then had dinner at a fun restaurant. I forgot my troubles for a week, had champagne, ice cream, ate the most delicious food (not on my diet) including the best organic fresh chevre that was out of this world. <br /><br />Now here in Pottstown, I am back to scheduling my MRI and bone scans, blood work (yuck) and working on my warrior self. Next week the greatest of head nurses (my mum) will be coming so that will be the best tonic for sure. With my hubby working full time at the boarding school teaching we can all keep our stress level-level.<br /><br />So I am still waiting to see what medication I shall be on, and what will be the game plan next. Hanging in there and appreciating the love out there.Kikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-34850180355579794312009-07-26T08:50:00.007+01:002009-07-26T09:13:48.157+01:00Green Goblin<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmXwB7q820PFefyWMx3YI9rxp68EazDZ_ug5_iEFhKaBi34HFu_kYFaThM01tZnOsMbDzwkXmq6pnBRhfRTxGrGI5JTsQfbG4KHEEuTHgYbtmnoMK0azXnIpDa0m17spYxm_v_aP0fFRo/s1600-h/Spider-Man+Classics+Green+Goblin1.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 166px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmXwB7q820PFefyWMx3YI9rxp68EazDZ_ug5_iEFhKaBi34HFu_kYFaThM01tZnOsMbDzwkXmq6pnBRhfRTxGrGI5JTsQfbG4KHEEuTHgYbtmnoMK0azXnIpDa0m17spYxm_v_aP0fFRo/s200/Spider-Man+Classics+Green+Goblin1.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5362675570435886114" /></a><br />Hello Friends,<br /><br />Just when you think it is safe, a new little twist, a new little wrinkle appears-and I am not talking about my face! New cancer cells, it appears, have taken up residence in my hip! Actually it is the Green Goblin from Spiderman. Painful bugger my god! I thought the pain was just me getting well "old". A new hurdle, a new level of understanding. <br /><br />Make love not war is great, but I think I need to ratchet it up, and be more warrior like as I need to kick some butt! Goblin butt! I had my "step son to be" Ash draw a huge poster of a warrior wolf for me to meditate on when I do my detox sauna. It works quite well, it makes me feel feisty which is good no? Tuesday I will finally start Tai Chi, which I have been saying for months, but now I need to kick my own butt if I want to get strong. <br /><br />Next week the appointments start, to confirm and make plans on what to do. Dr Weber, Dr. Sivieri, and then Dr. Georgiades. My dream team- I must say I believe they are the best! As for me I have already made myself quite the expert from both allopathic to homeopathic ways on how to deal. I found one remedy that mixes ground flax seeds with champagne twice a day! I told Jack now that is living! A girl should always have champagne. <br /><br />More later, just wanted to check in with you all.<br /><br />KikiKikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-1151344617071712622009-05-14T11:03:00.006+01:002009-05-28T00:53:28.996+01:00New Man in My LIfe<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzccavZ2rXq6c6-LmU-O4zZ8NThFbkdvkVwUi1ke0FK4dv9CigvaS0Jkx2_xzhQ8njcXxvG7ZLJxjlmzZy2HvFGRpPCArkEon0r0MzNKes5pfVxu6DsMYFTwxM-gvReOkIbGh7JJ85cl8/s1600-h/Geogriades2.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 143px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzccavZ2rXq6c6-LmU-O4zZ8NThFbkdvkVwUi1ke0FK4dv9CigvaS0Jkx2_xzhQ8njcXxvG7ZLJxjlmzZy2HvFGRpPCArkEon0r0MzNKes5pfVxu6DsMYFTwxM-gvReOkIbGh7JJ85cl8/s200/Geogriades2.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5335627097099332674" /></a><br />Meet Dr. Christos Georgiades a new man in my life that offers ninety percent of hope. Let me start at the beginning. <br /><br />Several months ago I started to research ways to remove tumors from the lungs, and came across this procedure called <a href="http://www.radiologyinfo.org/en/info.cfm?pg=rfalung">Radiofrequency Ablation (RFA</a>) which is an amazing procedure done with a thin needle that heats up tumors. Tumors love dark, cold, damp places so this intensive sunshine delivery system brings high heat to the growths, and stops them in their tracks. Prima! Good day sunshine I say.<br /><br />Anyway, I was shocked that no one at Johns Hopkins had suggested this procedure to me, as it is for people who can't have surgery (that's me), who are looking for a minimally invasive procedure that won't spread the cancer, (that's me) and not looking for a total cure, (that's me). So what is problem? Doctors don't share so the patient can have the best chance? I asked my oncologist about a recommendation and what he thought, his response "I don't see how RFA will help you". Shocked again, I was stunned that all he wanted to do was to keep me on hormone treatments (that actually aren't working that well) which means I will just end up as a statistic and not a very promising one. In my mind Dr. Wolff was fired. Isn't he supposed to be helping me? I can't begin to say how angry I was, and I have to admit his response made me jump back into my safety shell, however with the urging of my friend Brigitte she pushed me to get on with finding a specialist of my own, and voila! there he was Dr. Georgiades of radiology at Johns Hopkins. I met with him and his staff late April, and can report his team are a professional and friendly group. The good news is May 26th I will be getting my five chestnut shaped occupants zapped. Dr. Georgiades explained that while there is ninety percent chance of killing the tumors at the very least I can expect some shrinkage- and that will mean more time. Something I need while I make my body strong.<br /><br />I am starting to feel scared, but also trying to embrace this new adventure. Too bad I couldn't have one year without surgery, but at least this offers so much in return. Hope.Kikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-37826513860138854202009-03-24T17:19:00.015+00:002009-04-03T23:45:33.954+01:00Working Backwards To NowHi Everyone!<br /><br />It has been ages since I updated you all on what'sup, so much has passed, so many changes. Today however, I thought to just dig in, get on with it, and we can catch up as the months go. With that in mind I decided to work my way backwards.<br /><br />I just had a most delicious salad of advocado, carrots, and tomatoes. How pleasant it is to have a salad when spring is on it's way, and the sun is shining. Winter was hard going trying to find food that I could eat that was raw-who wants a cold dinner when it is snowing outside! Naturally all the good stuff was verboten! With the help of my friend Brigitte, we came to a compromise- going halfway seemed best. A little cooked, a little raw. The middle way-how Zen! With all the research I have done, apparently we were on to something as going completely raw too quickly is not so smart- lots of gas, indigestion, nausea. It can be really hard on the body to make such a shift from "crap" food to "wunder food" If you haven't read it try and get a copy of "The Raw Food Detox Diet" by Natalia Rose is a wonderful way to get going to a more healthy way of eating, plus there is some weight loss too. Talking of weight loss, I just lost 5 lbs from a virus I caught- certainly it has given me an opportunity to look a my diet more closely as well as watch my immune system. <br /><br />Lately, I have been in a bit of a funk as I realized so many of my plans have not gone the way I have expected. Has that ever happened to you? All is planned out like so, this is going to be like that, that is going to work with em - oh no - no matches at all! Hey! Argh! Hiss! After a good sulk, sometimes you just have too before the epiphany, the reality of the situation really forced me to take a much larger view, and really be more adaptive to life's shoves and nuances. Who says those plans were going to work out anyway, just because I made them were they perfect? Apparently not, not as far as the Universe is concerned. <br /><br />The real jewel in the crown for sure is actually on my finger! On Valentine's Day my love "Jack" asked me if I would be his wife. It was one of the most romantic moments of my adult life. So even though I am faced with so many challenges, I have someone, a companion, and bestfriend, who wants to help me through them. That is Grace, and makes going backwards more like going forwards!Kikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-78966391581170577762008-12-22T09:21:00.006+00:002008-12-22T10:07:23.040+00:00Make mine with gravy please!This past month I have been working with a much tighter regimen under the special guidance and help of the wonderful Dr. S. - 5 days detox sauna, at least 5 coffee "you know what's" a week, eating the usual vegan fare, and trying really hard to eat as much raw food as I can. However, tis the season! <br /><br />So far I have stayed away from the usual office "goodie" baskets that show up at this time of the year, with only one really naughty incident that occured after being tempted all day by one very fully loaded chocolate filled woven basket. As I whisked by it at the end of the day, I grabbed a Hershey's kiss and mini size milky way bar, and scoffed them down so quickly I wondered if that was really me, and did I really do that? Most importantly it was not such a big thing- just a little regression. <br /><br />One thing that it really helping, because it is so hard to eat cold food during the winter, is to put some gravy on it. And who does not love gravy? At our annual holiday lunch at my job, they had the big turkey-beef-stuffing buffet thing, and I found a little moistening really helped to enhance my vegetarian plate. I think that is oh so clever of me to come up with that. I get a bit of tasty fun and warmth, and eat my vegetables too!Kikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-35405475168695620632008-11-18T18:35:00.012+00:002008-12-01T12:34:32.090+00:00Two Steps Back<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBiaROFMiZYRMKeCynGapNGp1jpAk7LFT-noLnVqKWSj74XcewQCiW3fXuAmu6o1N5_j0smWg8_jQuykVWeQd3ZrhCRiF0yIPIcDBXJciCFdb1-xvm0zi9Q5yfYH6u763pvKUwR0Qn0fA/s1600-h/daisy+and+mildred.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 135px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBiaROFMiZYRMKeCynGapNGp1jpAk7LFT-noLnVqKWSj74XcewQCiW3fXuAmu6o1N5_j0smWg8_jQuykVWeQd3ZrhCRiF0yIPIcDBXJciCFdb1-xvm0zi9Q5yfYH6u763pvKUwR0Qn0fA/s200/daisy+and+mildred.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5270440687434344578" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br />Mildred, Daisy and the triplets (my 5 tumors) let it be known in my recent CT scan last week they needed to stretch out a little, they were feeling a growth spurt! Only a few millimeters but as my dour Oncologist put it - "it is real!" What happens now? - trick my ovaries into believing they are not working- how do you do that?- err we shove a huge needle into your abdomen wall and say "you might feel some discomfort" and we fill you up with hormones each month. I think this is the stage where the torture starts to begin. <br /><br />I am trying to keep the faith. Do more infared saunas, no alcohol at all now (agh!) or coffee (how worse could it get) no dairy, meat, fish, poulty. I was doing quite well, but I fell off the wagon a bit, and as a result, these cancer sisters let me know they are sincere about doin'n it for themselves. My message to them- we're in this together ladies- don't go off by yourselves. This is a team thing. And as a friend of mine says "I'm serious!"<br /><br />My mother just bought me a beautiful juicer so I can have fresh carrot juice every day-something cancer is not so crazy about. I had some this morning with broccoli and pineapple. It was okay- quite refreshing actually. Also I am experimenting again with my dehydrator- mushrooms, portobello mushrooms, they make a great third thing on the plate!<br /><br />How about a raw pumpkin pie for Thankgiving-it can be done "I'm serious!"<br /><br />Love to all my dear friends.Kikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-50886314061609451672008-11-07T22:04:00.009+00:002008-12-10T16:59:47.216+00:00Lifted by Art<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTZfayQQei67grsLXs-d8Rif6A2zgXrunoQBTy-m-y8aipM1Q8CqzXzhlTiNeZtugRNW7H6Lgobg7vo0aL2RCt33bQuKVqbkFAETAZ3cZYqJUTwVDrtz9tXXwRaKFzbxISNHX5vywurRg/s1600-h/prolificJPG.JPG"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 160px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTZfayQQei67grsLXs-d8Rif6A2zgXrunoQBTy-m-y8aipM1Q8CqzXzhlTiNeZtugRNW7H6Lgobg7vo0aL2RCt33bQuKVqbkFAETAZ3cZYqJUTwVDrtz9tXXwRaKFzbxISNHX5vywurRg/s200/prolificJPG.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5266042075561745090" /></a><br />One of the things I recently renewed in my life has been my love of painting. This happened the other day when a special friend of mine Kathy, offered me the use of her studio while she was out of the country. I accepted, but was not really sure if I could do anything, I had been so tired- how inspired could I be. It took a while to settle down and focus, but once the paints were squeezed out of the tube the genie was out of the bottle!<br /><br />I first did some very small pieces about 3 x 3 inches (that is how intimidated I was) then worked my way up to 12 x 12 inches, and finally created a work 30 x 30 inches. I would not have even done the larger one had it not been for my dear friend Charles who pushed me to get on with a challenge. Annoyed at such pushy behaviour from him I ventured up scale. I am so glad I did. <br /><br />Art has the ability to give so much to the painter, as I am witness to. The special dialogue one can have with one's creativity, and sources larger than oneself can be intoxicating and rejuvenating. The last few weeks have been the happiest, and I know that joy has a very positive effect on the immune system. So while I detox in the sauna, get my old fillings removed (mercury), and try to adhere to my "new life" protocols, I added an old one...painting.<br /><br />And thank you again Kathy.Kikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-11343990546368233322008-09-14T11:04:00.009+01:002008-09-20T15:02:36.488+01:00The Long Slog<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWberGCAupGEHcGzXBCEaxZvXaTCC7BJCYcZf0F4klf_C8sTYofQLLTH0064cEk8epTTL0HpaIxyO7xPzT37aASpsO7OdnzdSJpZvaeqtHJAXJSrRtzAScrTIKyZHwOx-ykYnrJ2-b6Gw/s1600-h/flowers+1.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWberGCAupGEHcGzXBCEaxZvXaTCC7BJCYcZf0F4klf_C8sTYofQLLTH0064cEk8epTTL0HpaIxyO7xPzT37aASpsO7OdnzdSJpZvaeqtHJAXJSrRtzAScrTIKyZHwOx-ykYnrJ2-b6Gw/s200/flowers+1.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5248103651754857954" /></a><br /><br />One of the hard things about trying to "save ones life" or at the very least put off "certain death", which we all face as soon as we are born, is what I call here the long slog. Without a daily measure, like a scale when one is trying to loose weight, it is so hard to follow one's progress. Usually I have to suffice with peeing on a piece of paper to see how alkaline I am, but it is not so accurate. Naturally, I can have blood tests and scans, but as you read before those are not handed out so easily. What that does then, this not having a gauge, is to make a person very hypersensitive to every ache or pain, temperature change, an "odd" a mood swing. A constant inner voice says "What's that?" "Did you feel that?" "That's so noisy!" and "what does that mean?" I am a bit exhausted as you can imagine. <br /><br />Still on the brighter side, super sensitivity can have it's plusses. It is amazing how much more alive I feel. Food never tasted so good. Silence never so sweet. Words more lyrical. Nature all the more breathtaking, and friendships all the more precious. That in a perverted way makes this journey so very interesting and fulfilling.Kikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-12600992248825222202008-08-19T00:24:00.011+01:002008-11-19T04:29:52.537+00:00From Disgruntled To Ungruntled<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieHrz58NFp8-5KN6GNqN3MTZjSL1hQudkJ8ZGGFxaPD9ZwUlgBvNVcrfh7XtG_shKe8JTtKuRLgK2sSQS5vY_CFgbf4zKXb76B4Ysds0J_5ePc-_sqv9fElqOmdA51UWaWiN9QNSpc0FY/s1600-h/tsangaris160.gif"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieHrz58NFp8-5KN6GNqN3MTZjSL1hQudkJ8ZGGFxaPD9ZwUlgBvNVcrfh7XtG_shKe8JTtKuRLgK2sSQS5vY_CFgbf4zKXb76B4Ysds0J_5ePc-_sqv9fElqOmdA51UWaWiN9QNSpc0FY/s200/tsangaris160.gif" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5236019716260070162" border="0" /></a><br />Getting frustrated again with my oncologist (Dr. Antonio Wolff) who was making it difficult for me to get my 2 month CT scan, I turned to my breast cancer surgeon and friend (remember I called him the disgruntled husband the other week) Dr. Ted Tsangaris. I just had to know what those naughty little tumors were doing. Working on changing their attitude or just partying! I knew if I had a chance to explain what had gone on over the past few months Ted and I could get back on the same page. Yup, we did it, and so as my buddy again he grabbed a pen, and filled in the form so I could get the scan. He also told me not to expect too much from the Tamoxifen as it works slowly, and things might be the same as two months ago. That's fine with me, I told him, no change would be good, I would rather have the same chestnut size tumors than new bigger ones with horns looking for trouble. Waiting for the results was a tough 24 hours but I made it, and Jasmine (his social worker nurse) called me to let me know I was stable. Ha! Ha! No change! Fabulous! I was stable! Not many people can boast that, and I now have the paper work to prove it.<br /><br />It seems then all the love, raw food, detox, coffee (you know where) and the Tamoxifen are rallying to the cause. It makes me want to keep going, and surely isn't it great how some people, even if they do get disgruntled will ungruntle themselves, and just do the right thing. How happy Ted has made me, my family, and friends too. Yey Ted! Your the best breast surgeon a girl can have!Kikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-61284728398567984212008-08-05T10:33:00.008+01:002008-11-16T12:01:12.146+00:00Acts of Kindness-It Saves My Bottom!<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhs-6xqHHBXgI9UIIP9425U-QxwrRAV0jjoUyPqlWghpH6l4Mua23GAxy6XZ_cj0NOHar-WIvIN0e_znRmruKQ57rydV4TZi5135tXgljkBWu-kcIZ-VtZDRAw9VwajwUoVUOVS2opCYw8/s1600-h/kiki.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhs-6xqHHBXgI9UIIP9425U-QxwrRAV0jjoUyPqlWghpH6l4Mua23GAxy6XZ_cj0NOHar-WIvIN0e_znRmruKQ57rydV4TZi5135tXgljkBWu-kcIZ-VtZDRAw9VwajwUoVUOVS2opCYw8/s400/kiki.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5236288348328073682" border="0" /></a><br /><br />Hi There My Dearest Friends (and when I say "friends" that includes family too!),<br /><br />Last week was really hard for me, so many set backs, yet I wanted to just thank all the people in my life who were there for me. Some of you let me cry on your shoulder, others offered me the scratchiest tissue the world has ever seen, others of you appeared at my work door to just say "hi", gave me a reassuring smile. There were sweet hugs, a thoughtful email, a card, a lunch and a couple of great projects assigned to me to get my creative teeth into. Then there were the hard core of you that could hang in there for the long talks and tears. I thank you for holding my emotions for me- because that what you do- you hold them, and that gives me some relief. How lucky I am to have so many dear supportive friends.<br /><br />I am truly blessed!Kikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8611150083541068102.post-53240825764719827902008-07-19T15:25:00.007+01:002008-12-22T10:04:40.641+00:00Allopathic + Homeopathic<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGUsI_0R82SFTVxSS5g6wZfcGH9s7Z0CIgrGtVaBiIIVOpFogBvzq-EK4muEVI4PsQcL1ag98qjtzMBvQbhRw3EGoWIpfubDYYIepBCUuRhECbmWRwWq6CsATGe27FnOfyHrY3HszOWw8/s1600-h/sprouts+and+wheat+grass.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGUsI_0R82SFTVxSS5g6wZfcGH9s7Z0CIgrGtVaBiIIVOpFogBvzq-EK4muEVI4PsQcL1ag98qjtzMBvQbhRw3EGoWIpfubDYYIepBCUuRhECbmWRwWq6CsATGe27FnOfyHrY3HszOWw8/s200/sprouts+and+wheat+grass.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5236023917145422050" /></a><br />Good News Dear Friends!<br /><br />I met with a medical doctor who also practices complementory medicine too. I am so pleased. Dr. New Hope for Kiki, or Dr. S gave me the plain talk, the truth talk, and many options, but more importantly a plan. He also agreed to be my central person for healing and getting me better.<br /><br />The plan is to keep taking the Tamoxifen, which he feels will assuredly shrink the tumors, detox my body (using the most civilized and also not so civilized ways to get the crud out) and keep to the raw food diet. Body work and psych work are also up there too. He said many times a trauma, or blocked stresses cause the body to be in a constant state of anxiety which causes too much adrenaline to circulate around the body, then combined with other factors, some we cannot control sh*t happens! Yikes!<br /><br />My other news is that I bought a dehydrator so I can cook food without destroying it's powerful nutritious enzymes. At high temperatures many vitamins and minerals are lost in our food, so by cooking at a low temperature 118 degrees I can get the most out of my healing recipes! Combined with my sprouts and raw fruit and vegetables, I have noticed my skin is softer and more radiant, and even though I feel tired, and sometimes grumpy, my energy level is rather good. I am comforted to know I am giving myself the best boost I can.<br /><br />Next week I will tell you about the Infrared Sauna and my visit to Fountains of Life (colonic time!)<br /><br />Love KikiKikihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292764487133478260noreply@blogger.com1